Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Just as we were stumped by Shaun's question at our mini Lit' conference today; "What are you going to do with the 10,000 cash you have taken over from the Norwagien lord?" Nick Wong who was acting as Duncan (king of scotland) replied " Buy new armour for Macbeth" and the whole class roared with laughter. If only every Lit class was like creative peer teaching, yet another dream.
Sometimes, I prepare so well for take off, checked every single component, matched every little feature and counter-checked further, but at the moment of take-off, something either uncontrollable or external force just forces for an undesireable outcome. I know I have prepared so well because it was performance under pressure, extreme pressure. Yet the results are unable to celebrate my effort, infact they are way disproportionate. To blame yourself's inadequecy and lack of effort is one thing, to under-achieve when you had worked so hard is yet another. And of course, the pressure will come down harder in reality than others think.
Yet, no complaints, nothing at all. I will keep trying in this very way, because it will shed light for I definitely know my route is right. Double-checked and vetted over by veterans, I hate to not show the capability and be blamed by the ignorant for it, still, no words, no complaints. It's right down to the end, even if the next chance is far off and the period in between is going to be difficult to endure.
Just like the flight route you chose for me, it is filled with immense pain, yet it is not painful, not at all. For such long periods I've been dryily toiling my wings as they attempt to lift me high without thermals. But have i doubted that soaring is possible? Soaring is the way? The thermals will come eventually, even if they dont, one day my wings and feathers will be so seasoned from hardship that the thermals won't matter on my way up to the skies. Don't dampen it all with your dis-trust, for it makes it all harder. Give me hope and I will have a direction to head into, a cloud to reach for at every other point, even if it is blown adrift before i reached it, I'd have climbed alot higher and stood there glancing down and watching with blessings. Guarding as always, no matter where you go.
With all the tears, I always find it easy to smile:")
相信我吧~
& more clueless fears.
3:38 AM
